A True Christmas Story - circa: December 25, 2013
Hanging out at the crib last night knocking back a couple of Tequila and OJ’s, watching the movie ‘Silver Linings Playbook’ (great movie btw!). Probably 7:30-7:45 p.m., whatever. And I hear someone in the building knocking loudly on a door. It sounded like they were knocking on one of the interior doors. That’s really rare in my building since most people are “buzzed-in” at the front door. Anyway, I didn’t think anything else about it - until I heard it AGAIN! So now I’m like “WTF? Let the dude in already!” But again, it stopped, so I figured all is well and I go back to watching my movie. A short time later, there’s that knocking again! And I’m like o.k., this is weird, so I mobilized. I jump up from the couch, throw on my Birks and open my apartment door to listen. I figured I was going to need to let someone know, gently, that they needed to stop banging on that door ‘cuz I was starting to get annoyed at this point - like when those Whos start in with their singing!
I poke my head out into the hallway, nothing. Go to the fire escape door, no one. Place was totally quiet, and nearly deserted given that it’s like, Christmas night, right? So I hunker back down on my couch and resume watching my movie. Some time goes by and there’s that knocking AGAIN! O.K., so now I’m kinda pissed, so I jump up, put the sandals on, and go on a hard-target search throughout the building – doors, fire escapes, the whole nine yards…nothing, not a sound, no one – top to bottom.
And then I hear a voice…
Or at least in the quiet, deserted apartment building, I thought I heard a voice. Honestly, I thought my mind was playing tricks on me ala “The Shining” or some shit. So I go back into my apartment and sit down to resume my movie when – KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK! I spring up off the couch and bolt into the hall – nothing. I go up to the 5th floor, nothing. Then, as I’m walking back down the stairs, I hear it again and realize that it’s coming from MY floor! I immediately thought of my elderly neighbor Dick – who at 81 years old, lives alone but is still ambulatory with a cane.
I hurry over to Dick’s door and tentatively say “Hello?” Instantly, there’s a voice behind the door saying (and I shit you not): “I’ve fallen and I can’t get back up!” I’m like, “FUUUUUUUCK!!!!” Holy shit! Not only had he fallen, but he biffed right up against his door which opens inward! This guy is 200+ pounds btw. So I’m like “OMG OMG OMG!” A few verbal exchanges later, I’d kind of ascertained that the only issue was that he’d fallen – nothing life-threatening, right? Right??
Luckily, I had the phone number of the owner of the apartment building, so I called him and quickly told him what the situation was and that I needed him down there PRONTO! He said “I’m at my cabin in the state of Oregon!” But he told me that he’d call the maintenance guy, Flip (not his real name). Flip lives nearby and has the master keys, so I’m like “Get him down here ASAP!”
So Flip’s rollin’, and I’m back at Dick’s door talking to him through the door, and his responses are coming more and more slowly, and sometimes, just silence...
So I’m like “Whoa, this is sketchy…” I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it you know? But I’m like, yeah I’m gonna make the call. So I dialed 911 and reported the situation to the dispatcher. Three to four minutes later, I hear sirens and see red strobes slapping against the sides of the buildings outside. I zip downstairs and let in a squad of MSN fire fighters, two paramedics and a cop. They retrieve the master keys from the lock-box outside (still no Flip), and within a few minutes, they’re forcing their way into Dick’s apartment. Dick had somehow managed to slither away from the door just enough so that they could squeeze through.
As I watched this whole scene play out, I got some glimpses through Dick’s door. The fire crew was at work getting him stabilized, neck brace, the usual. I’m apologizing profusely to Dick for not having come to his aid sooner, and he’s thanking me profusely for coming to his aid when I did! And then I see blood all over the floor where he’d fallen, and I’m like “Wha?!” One of the paramedics saw my reaction and said something about Dick’s foot or something, I don’t remember, but the blood seemed highly unusual given the situation, or what I thought the situation was. Anyway, they get Dick strapped into a rolling rescue chair, and the whole damned lot of them leave en-masse for the exit, the awaiting ambulance, and the Emergency Room beyond.
AFTERMATH
The apartment building resumes its usual quiet. The hallway floor is trashed with muddy,
bloody, wet boot-prints. Dick’s Christmas wreath lies in a heap on the floor outside the door where it once hung. And I go back to my movie. Case closed.
Until the next morning…
As I was having my coffee, I wrote a post-it note and stuck it on Dick’s door to let his daily home health aide, Dennis, know that he’d fallen and had been taken to the hospital.
Later, as I opened my door to head for the office, I see a note from Dennis thanking me for my assistance the previous evening. And simultaneously, there’s Dennis in the hall after having been in Dick’s apartment to assess the damage (which, given the amount of blood, might have been a real shocker had I not left that note, ha ha!).
There in the hall, I told Dennis about the goings on from the previous night. He had not had any word of this except for my note! Anyway, at that precise moment, Dennis’ phone rings, and it’s Dick’s best friend calling from the hospital. As it turns out, when Dick fell, he broke his leg. To make matters worse, one end of the broken bone had gone straight through his skin and was poking out! Hence the bloody mess on the floor. So, long story short, I was really glad that I’d called 9-1-1 when I did, seeing as how this older gentleman was actively bleeding out on the other side of the door, and at times like these you need the pros and not Barney Fife.
Given the deserted state of the apartment building on Christmas Day, Dick might have been in
for a very long night indeed. And given the nature of his injury, I’m not altogether certain that he would have seen the light of the following day. I’m not trying to be melodramatic here, but he’s really old, and really de-conditioned, and he was bleeding profusely, so you know, it’s all an equation, and time’s not really on your side in those circumstances, yo.
EPILOG: JUNE, 2014
Without fanfare, Dick returns home from nearly 6 months in rehab…
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